The Boneyard

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</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Director.........James Cummins </B></div> <div> <B>Screenplay.......James Cummins</B></div> <div> <B>Music............John Lee Whitener</B></div> <div> <B>Producer.........Richard F. Brophy</B></div> <div> <B>Executive Producer.....Jeffrey Sanfilippo</B></div> <div> <B>Special Make-up Effects Created by Bill Corso, James Cummins,</B></div> <div> <B>                                   & Backwood Film Effects</B></div> <div> <B>Music Supervisor.....Katherine Anne Porter</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Dramatis Personae</B></div> <div> <B>Jersey Callum......Ed Nelson</B></div> <div> <B>Alley Cates........Deborah Rose</B></div> <div> <B>Shepard............Norman Fell (CHUD II, Three's Company, The Ropers)</B></div> <div> <B>Gordon Mullin......James Eustermann</B></div> <div> <B>Dana...............Denise Young</B></div> <div> <B>Marty..............Willie Stratford Jr.</B></div> <div> <B>Miss Poopinplatz...Phyllis Diller (Mad Monster Party, Pink Motel)</B></div> <div> <B>Chen...............Robert Yun Ju Ahn</B></div> <div> <B>Mac................Rick Brophy</B></div> <div> <B>Little Ghoul & Dead Girl..........Sallie Middleton Kaltreider</B></div> <div> <B>Medium Ghoul.......Janice Dever</B></div> <div> <B>Big Ghoul..........Cindy Dollar-Smith</B></div> <div> <B>Floopsoms and </B></div> <div> <B>Poopinplatz Ghouls.Michael Haun</B></div> <div> <B>Floopsoms..........Binny</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><U>Critique</U></B><B>: What happened? We thought this movie would be a complete dog (giant poodle), but the cast wouldn't let it happen. You'll marvel at Phyllis Diller's performance. The excellent child zombies really provide a few chills. Norman Fell (Mr. Roper) with a pony tail and an earing and not detracting from the action? The fine acting of Rose who succeeds despite the impossible task of making a psychic detective story interesting, and of a lively performance by Nelson are hurt by the inconsistent direction and the decision to cart out the ridiculous Poopinplatz monster and the very questionable giant poodle which brings up the basic disappointment in this and many horror films, namely the fine line between camp and junque. The straight beginning including a fine portrayal of a psychic on the verge of destruction by her own gifts, gives way to a decent zombie romp, and fizzles into an effects creature farce. Although Phyllis Diller's oevre would suggest naming her character Poopinplatz and coaxing yet another boring clown performance out of her, the character she creates could have done without it entirely as she delivers a strong performance, when she is allowed to portray a real morgue desk clerk. Why she has to become a high tech "Evil dead zombie" (wonderful in its own context) rather than a made up human zombie remains one of the puzzling disappointments of our time. Likewise, the poodle, as amazing to look at as it is, is trapped somewhere between silliness and horror and makes uncomfortable viewers turn to each other for counsel. Nods to </B><I><B>The Poseidon Adventure</B></I><B> and the </B><I><B>Return of the Living Dead</B></I><B>. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B><U>Plot Summary</U></B><B>: Homicide Detective Lt. Jersey Callum knocks at the door of but finds the residence unoccupied. A search of the house reveals newspaper articles about a psychic consulted by police. Assistant is assaulted by a woman with a pillow Alley Oates has left the English department. Kid calls her a witch. Det. Callum has discovered the bones of three children held by a mortician, who fed them pieces of his cadavers. Alley has experienced too much grisley business and participates very reluctantly. Alley has a vision of a child's skeleton hugging her in a plea for help. "Help them too" reads a banner with a picture of a young girl. The suspect Mr. Chen, speaks of a curse "they" are becoming restless harder to manage the cycle must be stopped you must stop them. Chen's masters and three centuries of morticians his family are cursed to feed them "Kyoshi" the undead or else! An endless supply of protein. Alley thinks he may be telling the truth. She agrees to help on the condition there be no publicity. At the morgue, Miss Poopinplatz and her poodle Poop run a tight poopship Boneyard. Coroner Willie Shipper has worked with Allie before and is happy to see her working again. The only personal effects are what Dave calls a "toy doll." Shep cuts a piece of hair from one of the three children for the psychic to work with. Allie was an unwed pregnant but lost the child when she was diagnosed with cancer. Then her Dreams began, too real to ignore until she discovered they were true. Due to technical problems with the doors, the cops, a morgue attendant with a new corpse and Allie are trapped in the morgue area. Allie begins to get impressions from the child's hair. The oriental man brings a knife to a woman's hand above a child's corpse, and it begins to stir under its covers. While no one is watching, the hand of the corpse which was brought in begins to twitch. Allie sees in her mind's eye that the corpses downstairs are waking up. The cops watch as a new corpse is about to be opened up. She suddenly leaps up as the incision is made. Allie tries to get the stickler Poopinplatz to open up the door. She calls ahead and the impatient Allie takes the keys herself bringing the wrath of Poopinplatz on herself. Allie enters the morgue area to find blood spattered all around and corpses of the children gnawing at human parts. Not surprisingly, shooting said is not effective. The woman who had been on the autopsy table, Dana, had attempted suicide and wasn't really dead. Willie, the two cops and Allie hole up in a building. It appears the Kyoshi has gotten out. Chen has meanwhile committed suicide. Apparently it is able to produce new recruits. The group tries to make their way out of the basement to warn the outside world. Poopinplatz has dug up another key and is now snooping around the morgue. She approaches the children who soon run from their gnawing at corpses to attack her. In the process of getting away, Poopinplatz gets a mouthful of some kind of slime and seems to have gotten pretty sick. Officer Gordon and Dana try to make their way out of the installation and strike up a romance in the process. However, the romance threatens to be short lived. The group decides that blowing the chest out of the things is what does the job on the zombies. Folklore centers evil around the heart. Unfortunately, Poopinplatz's condition worsens as she becomes an eight foot tall bug eyed fake looking zombie monster. Apparently that mouthful of zombie slime is a recruiting method. Jersey is pretty badly hurt in the encounter and the group tries to force their way out of the area using a forklift which can double as a zombie piercer. Next it turns out Poops has been lapping up some slime and has been transformed into a gigantic absurd looking miniature poodle. They escape through the vents pursued by the monster with "Poseidon Adventure" style conflicts along the way.</B></div> <bR> <div>  <IMG SRC="http://service.bfast.com/bfast/serve?bfmid=2181&sourceid=39400659&categoryid=dvd_scifihor2" BORDER="0" WIDTH="1" HEIGHT="1" NOSAVE > <A HREF="http://service.bfast.com/bfast/click?bfmid=2181&sourceid=39400659&categoryid=dvd_scifihor2" TARGET="_top"><IMG SRC="http://a1204.g.akamai.net/f/1204/1181/24h/www.affiliate.net/affnet/images/vid_dvd468X60C.gif" BORDER="0" WIDTH="468" HEIGHT="60" ALT="Check Out Our Horror Collection"></A>  </div> </td> </tr></table></body>